Language is so extremely powerful. There are so many aspects in your life where simply stating things out loud can really change how life goes for you. Some call this prayer, or releasing energy out to the universe, whatever you want to call it it works.
Now you may be wondering what this has to do with schooling? It is really quite simple, your children do hear you. They may not always listen but on some level they always hear you. How do you talk about your children? How do you talk about their schooling experience? Are you respectful of your child, even when they are uncooperative?
How many times have you been so frustrated with life and when something is hard you don't put in full effort and just say "I can't". How frustrated do you get with your child when they do the same thing? There is much truth in the Henry Ford quote, ' Whether you think you can, or you think you can't- your right.'
When you are in the midst of frustration, have you ever told your you child that they are stupid, or that any idiot could figure this out or really any other comment on their lack of intelligence? This can be damaging to your child.
If you are regularly being told by the people who love you that you are less than intelligent, don't you think that would have a lasting effect? I really try to focus on my language with the boys. I try to lift them up and make them feel like they able to do things. Even when it is hard, and they are not understanding. I refrain for telling them that anyone could do it, because clearly anyone can't as they are unable to. I acknowledge their trouble, and ask them what they need. I encourage them that they can do it, and I will help them to succeed.
Now there are times where I slip and I say things that hurt feelings. Sometimes you just say things out of frustration. What you do need to do is acknowledge your mistake, and rectify it. Just like most people expect their children to do when they make mistakes. The best way to have good behavior is model good behavior.
Remember your child is learning. While it may seem like a simple task to you, it could be a challenge for them. You had to learn once too!